A single girl’s three course dog’s breakfast

12 Apr


On Saturday I attended a lovely and enlightened wedding. Apart from everything being beautiful, personal and carefully considered, the wedding was entirely inoffensive to single guests. There was none of the following:

  • Putting of all singles on one table
  •  Humiliation associated with throwing of bouquet/garter
  • Dancing designed for pairs only, which inevitably leaves singles feeling self-conscious/excluded.

So I just wanted to say snaps to the happy couple. It was so refreshing to be at a ‘singles-friendly’ wedding.

manMap's dog's breakfastSecondo

On Friday night I witnessed an interesting flirting technique at The Occidental. A woman in her mid-20s, clad in a short pleather skirt and clutching a pint in one hand and a cigarette in the other, did her best to attract guys by singing I touch myself.

At first, we were confused. But then we saw her slow-grind dancing and realised she was trying to seduce one or all of the guys sitting near her. The technique can’t be that great though because she was still at it when I left an hour later, although she’d moved on to Wind beneath my wings. This confused me more than the singing in the first place. Would any straight guy fall for a woman singing Bette Midler to him?


Drum roll please…after spending some quality time with my enormous mapping- spreadsheet, I’d like to announce that the CBD venue which had the highest percent of single men is The Harbour View. And just in case the Harbour View isn’t to your liking, you’ll be happy to know that in nearly half the CBD venues I mapped, at least 50% of the male patrons were single. Embrace ladies, the single guys are out there!


3 Responses to “A single girl’s three course dog’s breakfast”

  1. singleabbie April 12, 2011 at 8:20 pm #

    I actually laughed out loud!
    Thanks, abbie. x

    • Lucie Stevens April 12, 2011 at 9:08 pm #

      You’re welcome Abbie! Thanks for reading 🙂

  2. Pow April 14, 2011 at 11:12 am #

    its not about the singing Bet Midler, its about drawing attention to yourself. Although im not convinced slow grinding and singing ‘touch myself’ will get you the right attention! …hey maybe try Candy Shop by 50 cent 😛

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